5 Dangerously Awesome Ways to Improve the Next 4th of July — cracked.com

From an objective standpoint, I guess there's nothing technically wrong with the Fourth of July. There's beer, loud noises, hot sun, and food, and those things tend to be pretty difficult to mess up. But there's always been one big problem that I've had with our nation's birthday: It's too. Damn. Wussy. Luckily, I have five plans that are all about taking things that aren't quite working about Fourth of July, and giving them that little burst of madness they need to really shine. And all these plans are as terrible as they are ... uh, terrible. These plans are just terrible. That's the only adjective, and for that reason, let's do the shit out of them. After all, it's our goddamn birthday.

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