I’ll never forget the first time I realized Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen were haunting me. I jerked awake in the middle of the night, gasping for breath, with the images from my nightmare still replaying in my brain on a six-second loop like some kind of horrifying Vine. The version of myself in my dream was just hanging out in the kitchen, waiting for the tea kettle to boil, when I saw them standing in my doorway, wearing oversized coats, smiling their unassuming-but-oddly-intimidating smiles. When I tried to run to my bedroom, they teleported and reappeared in front of me again, creepy smiles still intact. They never actually touched me, but their faces burned into my brain. I’ll never be able to explain what was so scary about that dream, but I’ll never forget it. Especially not now.
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