5 Oscar Secrets That Will Make You Wish You Hadn't Watched — cracked.com

Last night's Academy Awards ceremony invited 35+ million viewers to watch in wonderment as a bunch of millionaires cracked self-aware jokes about how exclusive and aloof they are while doing nothing to amend their behavior, as well as verbally congratulating themselves for braving an abominable 50-degree downpour during a time when the rest of the country is being crushed beneath an arctic hellscape.

Read More